The Crazy Awesome Johnson Family Blog: He wasn't crying

Thursday, May 14, 2009

He wasn't crying

I had the following conversation a couple of days ago.

Me: Matthew, why is Ethan crying?

Matthew: ..........

Me: Matthew, why is Ethan crying?

Matthew: .........................Well......................... I was standing on the counter...

.....and when I got off I slipped and fell...............and I was crying...............

Me: ???

Matthew:...............................So I punched him in the face.

Me: WHAT?!?!

Matthew: He wasn't crying!

Apparently Ethan wasn't showing enough sympathy, so Matthew decided to give him something to cry about.

1 comment:

Becky Jo said...: I am still laughing - I can't stop! Someone help me! We love that kid!; June 23, 2009 at 7:32 AM

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The Wall

"So I had a weird burp...that turned into throw-up...that tasted like the last three days' dinners." -Sherrie
"There's creepy monsters in my eyes" -Ethan
"Your hair is ugly...but I like it." -Ethan
Mikayla: "Matthew, what do you want to be when you grow up?" Matthew: "...Normal"
"We don't say 'Booyah in your faces'. It's not nice" -Ethan
"It smells like girls in here [...pause...] I mean toilets." -Matthew
"Is there chocolate milk in Kindergarten?.............Good, 'cuz I'm starving!" -Matthew
Matthew: "I hate strike naked." Dad: "What's 'strike naked?'" Matthew: "It's when people are all the way naked. ''Thout their clothes on."
"If you don't have a costume to wear for Halloween, you should just be yourself. And some people might still be scared of you!" -Jayden
"They're kissing...that's 'cuz they're in love and they want to get married." - Matthew
"I need you to write it down because I don't have a very useful memory." - Jayden
"I love Dad. He's my greatest hero." - Matthew
"I'm your favorite mom." - Mikayla
"Im hungry...'cuz my tummy is bored and it needs something to eat." - Matthew
"Not yet, the paper's got to die. It die. HeeHeeeHee!!! It die... Now I flush? Okay!" -Ethan
Matthew in Sacrament Meeting: "I don't NEED water to remember Jesus."
"Say sorry the orange." -Ethan
Me: You're the coolest! Ethan: "no, I Awesome!"
"I have a very un-useful memory." -Jayden
"Maybe I know why he's crying; because maybe babies miss Jesus!" -Matthew
"We don't throw up on other aliens." -Jayden
[Matthew explaining how he got a scrape on his toe while in his room] Matthew (crying): "A bug bit me!" Jay: "That doesn't look like a bug bite." Matthew: "A bug scratched me!" Jay: "Matthew, what were you doing?" Matthew: "Maybe I tripped on a rock." Jay: "Matthew, what were you doing in your room?" Matthew: "Um...I was fighting with my dresser."
"Matthew, let's not be safe with that sharp knife." -Sherrie
"Dad, look! Blood! I picked my lip, and then my lips slide down on my finger and turned to blood!" -Matthew
"I'm thinking if you want a kiss, then there are some things about your face that you need to change." -Sherrie
"I'M NOT SO FUNNY-- I'M TOUGH!" -Matthew
"Once upon a time, there was a BIG butt-truck..." -Matthew
"When you say 'three' I get a spanking." -Matthew
"Matthew, when you're a grandpa, Dad is gonna be dead." -Jayden
"When you're a grown-up, you can do whatever you would like--except break the rules." -Jayden
"Dad! We WANT to get fat!" -Matthew
"See! I don't have any poop on my hand, 'cuz it wasn't on the bottom, 'cuz I'm a big boy; 'cept I'm not a very big boy, 'cuz I pooped my pants. See? They're snowball poops." -Matthew
"The poop--we have to work on." -Sherrie
"Please bless that no airplanes will crash into things." -Jayden praying on September 11
"When you smell your toes, they're yuck." -Matthew
"Mommy, did Daddy lost his poor meatball?" -Matthew
"Diarrhea poop's not fun; just regular poop." -Jayden (at age 4; it's just one of our favorite quotes!)
"Prob'ly I need to go poop, 'cause the pee's not going out." -Matthew
"Daddy, I love you; I know when you're being mean, you're just upset." -Jayden
"Boogers always come back." -Matthew
"Daddy, we don't eat dinosaur brains!" -Jayden
"Please bless us to not be disgusting." -Jayden (while praying)
"Mikayla, can you don't scissor me?" -Matthew
"Did Ethan eat my weapon?" -Matthew
"If you don't have a costume to wear for Halloween, you should just be yourself. And some people might still be scared of you!" -Jayden
Matthew: "I hate strike naked." Dad: "What's 'strike naked?'" Matthew: "It's when people are all the way naked. ''Thout their clothes on."